Date: 06/02/2011 11:05 AM Title: Chapter 1
Such superb descriptive writing! I just adore the way you've depicted the cleaning up ritual ... a ritual which brings Jason and his car so close to each other almost as two lovers, even if the latter is lifeless! I couldn't help smiling when you wrote that Jason thought his car ran best when it was clean! That's my same thinking, and something which not everyone understands well the meaning when I say it! Thanks a lot for a lovely read!
Date: 06/02/2011 12:00 AM Title: Chapter 1
I love your insights into Jason, how he enyoys solitude and is centered and at peace when he's taking care of his car, even as he's intensely driven -to make his car perfect, to win the race, and to win the war against Spectra. His car brings out his softer, almost nurturing side, but his car is also his primary weapon -an interesting juxtaposition.
Thanks for writing this!
Date: 06/01/2011 5:38 PM Title: Chapter 1
You have done a great job of showing us Jason's thoughts and feelings while he does what he loves. Yes I could see this a being a form of meditation, much like I believe washing the dishes is for me. You don't have to think about what you are doing and can let your mind wander where it needs to.
Date: 06/01/2011 11:41 AM Title: Chapter 1
This is a very insightful look into Jason's psyche. I love the way you show his personality through the way he treats his car. Driving and racing scertainly are a part of him, and you have illustrated that very well here!
Date: 06/01/2011 6:25 AM Title: Chapter 1
Lee, you know how much I love this fic! I still revel in the feeling of the actual drive you manage to convey so brilliantly...
You are, by far, one of the most talented writers I have ever read and your ability to write every genre thrown at you with style and a light hand astounds me - even after all this time! Yours is a natural talent, honey - and I am so happy you are sharing it with us!
Date: 06/01/2011 5:47 AM Title: Chapter 1
I enjoyed this a lot. I like the concept of Jason doing something physical (and useful) instead of meditation, and there are lots of nice little touches, such as Tiny and Keyop leaving wrappers in his car, and it not having as many seats to clean when transmuted. And that he thinks being picked up must be like flying...but actually he prefers driving.
Just a couple of little nitpicks - I don't get a clear sense of the location. I feel like I want it to be somewhere out in the middle of nowhere, no houses, no people, but then there's this convenient water supply which makes it sound much less deserted.
And if he was practicing marksmanship he wouldn't be shooting at cans and bottles. For a bit of fun, sure. But they're simply far too big to be useful, serious practice for a crack shot.
But I'm nitpicking. This is excellently presented, technically flawless as far as I can see, and well paced.