Reviews For "A Critical Moment for the Science Ninja Team" A rewrite.
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Reviewer: Becky Rock Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 11/01/2011 6:17 PM Title: A moment of Peace

DB, I have thoroughly enjoyed your version of the puppy episode. I think you might be the first author to give Nambu a birdstyle and I loved reading him in action.

I look forward to reading the follow-up.



Author's Response: Becky, It means a lot to me that you have enjoyed this rewrite. I have had a ton of fun doing it.

Reviewer: Becky Rock Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 07/22/2011 4:06 PM Title: Chapter 9: Dance of the Mechas (Part 2)

Dragon, another fine chapter. Nambu in birdstyle is priceless.



Author's Response: Thanks a lot Becky. It means a lot to me that you, and everyone else, is enjoying this. Thanks again for beta reading.

Reviewer: gatchamarie Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 07/11/2011 11:50 AM Title: Chapter 1: The night before.

You've done such a great job again in describing the human and family aspect of the characters, Dragonsbain, especially where Nambu is concerned!  It's so nice to see the Doctor not that clinical as he's often described!  You also managed to make me giggle with Joe and Ken! Thanks again for a lovely read!

Author's Response: Dear Gatchamarie, The basic idea that I'm attempting to get across is that childern will not do something this all encompassing if there is no one that they can at least trust. Let's face it, if the team thought that they were being used, manipulated or threatened by anyone, that person or group would cease to exist. Thus, the team must trust,respect and love Nambu. It wasn't Tatsunoko's job to explore the depts of relationships between characters. The best explained relationship was between Kenaterio, Nambu and Ken. That barely scratched the surface. I guess that is why I jumped on this challenge. It is making me very happy that I'm able to get the human and family aspects,or, at least, my version, of them across to everyone. I'm also glad that people are enjoying the read. I'm DEFINATELY going to do a story about the itsy,bitsy spider excerise. That little blurb has definately been running around my mind growing into something much bigger. A showcase of how Ken and Joe's devious little minds worked back then.Please continue to enjoy and all the feedback has helped a lot.

Reviewer: TransmuteJun Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 07/09/2011 10:28 AM Title: Chapter 5 : Every parents nightmare.

I love he way you're focusing on Nambu's concern over Joe's injury, and what he is going through as he sees one of his children suffering. You've really painted a full character profile of the doctor right here in chapter 5!

Author's Response: Thanks TJ. I'm glad you are enjoying this.

Reviewer: Becky Rock Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 07/09/2011 8:11 AM Title: Chapter 7: Calm before the storm

Dragon, I am continuing to enjoy this read. The 'itsy-bitsy spider' part was a good tension breaker. Sometimes, as you know, becoming ticklish came happen at any time.

No little Condors - I'm curious how Joe will handle that.

 Looking forward ro more.



Author's Response: Thanks Becky, I should point out that where I placed Joe's thigh wound didn't knock out his ability to have kids. Very damm close though. It was a motivational spur for Nambu. Also, my apologies to any guys reading this, this injury will take Joe's focus off of his brain injury. Which definitely helps the healing process. I'm glad you like the "Itsy, bitsy spider" part. I'm going to have to write that one out. It came from the question of how Ken and Joe, especially Ken, can be so ultra aware of their environment. Then how would Nambu teach them that. Then how two 9 year old boys can hijack the exercise and turn it to a game. I totally blame the animators of Ken and Joe for the laughter part. They both have a stance where they close their eyes, slightly spread their wings and 99% of the time have a slight smile or smirk on their face. My mind added it all up and came up with Itsy, bitsy spider.

Reviewer: Becky Rock Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 06/18/2011 7:36 PM Title: Chapter 5 : Every parents nightmare.

This is getting better and better. It's well written and I love reading the connection between Joe and Nambu.

Reviewer: Becky Rock Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 06/11/2011 11:07 AM Title: Chapter 3 : "Scars"

Kathy, I'm loving this more and more. Is that how the emergency team kept you going? Can't wait for more!

Author's Response: Thanks Becky. Yes. Everyone just kept asking me, what I thought were, really stupid questions over and over again. It is part of the coma scale work up. I was rated a 5. Richard Hammond, from Top Gear, was brought into hospital as a 2. The lower the number the worst you are. Check out the You Tube video of his crash. Made mine look like child's play. I did a really bad rendition of "Closer to the heart" in the ambulance.

Reviewer: jublke Signed [Report This]
Date: 06/03/2011 12:45 PM Title: Chapter 1: The night before.

You really got me with Katse singing Oh, What a Beautiful Morning!  I will never hear that song in quite the same way again.  :)  But poor Joe.  No matter how many times I read about the puppy episode, I always wonder why.  Why a puppy?  Why a centerfuge?  Oh, and welcome to Gatchfanfic, Dragonsbain!  :) 

Author's Response: Dear jublke, Katse and Broadway. It's a match made in Heaven. I had to do it. Hopefully, by the end of the rewrite, I'll give my expiation of why Joe had to get that dog. Thanks for the Welcome.

Reviewer: gatchamarie Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 06/02/2011 10:45 AM Title: Chapter 1: The night before.

You're doing a great job in describing, and explaining what might have happened before the mission!  I also like the way you're portraying the "family" relationship between the Team and Dr. Nambu!  Maybe you've described Ken just a bit more miserly than he really must have been!  But then, I might be biased since he's my favourite character!:)

Speaking for myself, I don't mind the random Romaji words at all!  I like to find this hint of originality in a Gatchaman related story!  I've also found a way to search for meanings in case I'd encounter any unfamiliar words!  Please keep this going as I'm looking forward to know more!



Author's Response: Gatchamarie thank-you. The whole scene in the restaurant was just my idea for a good laugh before I had to start getting dark. Ken and his forever tab with Jun was just way to easy of a target. Trust me Ken has always had my respect. He is trying to be Captain Picard at the tender age of 18. He pulls it off, for the most part.

Reviewer: lborgia88 Signed [Report This]
Date: 06/01/2011 11:24 PM Title: Chapter 1: The night before.

I like the way you're filling in some of the gaps in episode 20, like giving a reason why Joe was late at the beginning.  I look forward to seeing what you do with the rest of this episode, particularly with its gaps in logic!

Author's Response: Thanks Iborgia88. Everybody, do I need to translate anything? I stuck with the Romaji for ease of reading. Or, if it is to annoying, I will stick to English.

Reviewer: TransmuteJun Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 06/01/2011 11:38 AM Title: Chapter 1: The night before.

An interesting start to the mission. I wonder why Joe was sleeping so deeply when the others weren't? I love the look at Katse celebrating. It's early enough in the series for him to think that this could be the 'one fell swoop' that hands Galactor victory, and you can see it in his attitude. 

Author's Response: Dear TJ, Joe always has a lot of activities going on. So, if he needed some downtime, he would have to schedule it. Thus, he gave himself permission to totally relax. Also, being a teenager, he can achieve that really deep sleep that only an earthquake or a very determined parent can wake them from.

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