Reviewer: Julieann Signed
Chapter 1: Chapter 1
This was a nice short piece about a subject we've all thought about concerning the Eagle. I like the created hobbies. Geez, Jinpei with a violin? Where's one of those shuriken?!?
Interesting how you had Jun seeing other guys from time to time, but no inclination of jealosy from Ken when he observes it. With Koji, we know she's dated (or seen) other guys. And Ken does seem rather oblivious at times, so that's no huge surprise in an outward way. But you do have to wonder what is going on inside.
Which is what makes this fanfic so fun, since it's first-person from Ken. :)
It looks like some of the formatting here might have been messed up when you uploaded it. There are stray exclamation points here and there, and spare spaces.
Example: Rumi Boronbo, th! e girl in question, had been held hostage by Gallactor in order to ran som highly
The last part, should that have been "... in order to run some highly..."?
If I ever get the ADV DVD's I'm going to have to watch this episode again, expecially at the end. I think I've only seen the BotP version. From the sound of this, the ending is slightly different. It would be fun to compare. :)Author's Response:
Thank you, thank you, thank you for the heads-up! I thought I caught all those pesky errors in the text. I'll fix those pronto.
I hadn't really considered having Ken express what he thought about Koji. I get the impression that Jun didn't publicize her dates, but Ken knows about them anyway and prefers to keep his cards close to his chest. :-)